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Mar. 23rd, 2006 10:17 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
odette_riverTitle: Crusade
Author: RedFive
Season: Nine
Spoilers: Spoilers for the spoilers of Crusade.
Disclaimer: If I owned it, would I be posting this here?
Sometimes she just wanted to scream. She had learned to fit in, learned how to bow and quiver before the Priors, learned how to avoid everyone and yet still seem part of the village. But that didn't make it any better. She still worried for her life nearly every minute of the day. She had already died once; she did not want that to happen again.
But then this had happened.
Apparently the village elders arranged everyone's marriages. They had accepted her story of a wandering life, but once she settled in their village, it ultimately meant her marriage. They hadn't told her at once, of course, and she hadn't figured it out. No, they let her eke out a meager existence for a few months before they offered her a choice: marriage, or death.
It wasn't exactly a hard decision.
Nor was it a particularly pleasant one.
So she had agreed to marriage. Then she tried to escape and got caught almost immediately, which only hastened the day of her wedding. She spent her time plotting and trying not to remember the way things had been. She had to focus on the present if she ever wanted a future.
Two days later, she began her married life. She would not go so far as to say it was awful. It provided one more chance for her to hide. But it was not something she wanted. None of this had been anything she wanted. What she wanted… But she had promised herself not to think about that.
She spent her time going through the motions of a marriage, but it felt like nothing mattered. She had thought her world would spin out of control, but instead it just stopped. She had no reason to live unless she thought about it. Then she would remember the SGC and that she was trying to get back to it, that she was waiting—hoping—for a rescue.
Her life progressed slowly, through time, if nothing else. Her image of herself slowly wasted away before her eyes. She hardly knew herself anymore; she had a different name, different identity, different life, none of it particularly pleasant.
Then she found out about the baby.
She didn't tell her husband. Everyday she was going to, and everyday she found a reason to put it off, and everyday it got harder to figure out a way to tell him.
She did not want a baby. Babies meant work and no sleep. She did not particularly want to work, and sleep she would pick over caring for a baby. Babies meant responsibility and being tied down, not that she had many places to go at the moment, anyway, but it's the thought that counts.
After a few weeks of agonizing, she realized what she had to do. Her baby would not be raised here, bowing and scraping in front of the Ori. She needed to go somewhere safe, somewhere where she would not have to worry about two lives at once.
She found only one solution: the SGC. Regardless of who was or was not there, it was the one place she could remember feeling safe in a very long time. They would, she hoped, accept her.
So she found a way to contact them.
Author: RedFive
Season: Nine
Spoilers: Spoilers for the spoilers of Crusade.
Disclaimer: If I owned it, would I be posting this here?
Sometimes she just wanted to scream. She had learned to fit in, learned how to bow and quiver before the Priors, learned how to avoid everyone and yet still seem part of the village. But that didn't make it any better. She still worried for her life nearly every minute of the day. She had already died once; she did not want that to happen again.
But then this had happened.
Apparently the village elders arranged everyone's marriages. They had accepted her story of a wandering life, but once she settled in their village, it ultimately meant her marriage. They hadn't told her at once, of course, and she hadn't figured it out. No, they let her eke out a meager existence for a few months before they offered her a choice: marriage, or death.
It wasn't exactly a hard decision.
Nor was it a particularly pleasant one.
So she had agreed to marriage. Then she tried to escape and got caught almost immediately, which only hastened the day of her wedding. She spent her time plotting and trying not to remember the way things had been. She had to focus on the present if she ever wanted a future.
Two days later, she began her married life. She would not go so far as to say it was awful. It provided one more chance for her to hide. But it was not something she wanted. None of this had been anything she wanted. What she wanted… But she had promised herself not to think about that.
She spent her time going through the motions of a marriage, but it felt like nothing mattered. She had thought her world would spin out of control, but instead it just stopped. She had no reason to live unless she thought about it. Then she would remember the SGC and that she was trying to get back to it, that she was waiting—hoping—for a rescue.
Her life progressed slowly, through time, if nothing else. Her image of herself slowly wasted away before her eyes. She hardly knew herself anymore; she had a different name, different identity, different life, none of it particularly pleasant.
Then she found out about the baby.
She didn't tell her husband. Everyday she was going to, and everyday she found a reason to put it off, and everyday it got harder to figure out a way to tell him.
She did not want a baby. Babies meant work and no sleep. She did not particularly want to work, and sleep she would pick over caring for a baby. Babies meant responsibility and being tied down, not that she had many places to go at the moment, anyway, but it's the thought that counts.
After a few weeks of agonizing, she realized what she had to do. Her baby would not be raised here, bowing and scraping in front of the Ori. She needed to go somewhere safe, somewhere where she would not have to worry about two lives at once.
She found only one solution: the SGC. Regardless of who was or was not there, it was the one place she could remember feeling safe in a very long time. They would, she hoped, accept her.
So she found a way to contact them.
