odette_river | i could drink a case of you - a crack!Mary/Jesus/Judas fanmix

I present a crack!Mary/Jesus/Judas fanmix. I make no excuses, nor do I have any explanations. These things just happen.

Disclaimer: This is a mix that supposes a romantic relationship between Mary Magdalene and Jesus and Judas. Yes, that’s Jesus from the Bible. I’m not trying to claim that this is actually what happened. In fact, as this is a crack mix, I’m pretty much claiming that it didn’t and that it’s just amusing to think about it. But. If this offends, please look away.

part one:
the relationship

1. When You Were Young, The Killers

he doesn’t look a thing like Jesus
but he talks like a gentleman
like you imagined when you were young

2. Feel, Marié Digby

are you alive? show me you’re human
can’t you feel, feel, feel, feel?

3. Saviour, LIGHTS

free my hands and feet
and maybe I won’t always fall, save me
savior
I just wanna run to you

4. Rock Your Soul, Elisa

on our skin you’re holding my hand I’m holding your life
and feel like I’m one with you, I’m one with you

5. A Case of You, Julia Murney

oh you’re in my blood like holy wine
and you taste so bitter but you taste so sweet
oh I could drink a case of you
I could drink a case of you, darling

interlude:
the relationship drama

6. Learning to Fall, Boys Like Girls

could you be with him?
or was it just a lie?
he doesn’t catch you like I do
and you don’t know why

7. Iris, Microrator (instrumental)

and I’d give up forever to touch you
‘cause I know that you feel me somehow
you’re the closest to heaven that I’ll ever be
and I don’t want to go home right now

part two:
jesus’s angst

8. Goodnight My Angel, Celtic Woman

I promise I would never leave you
and you should always know
I will never be far away

9. All These Things That I’ve Done, The Killers

I wanna stand up, I wanna let go
you know, you know - no you don’t, you don’t
I wanna shine on in the hearts of men
I want a meaning from the back of my broken hand

10. Perfect, Simple Plan

hey dad look at me
think back and talk to me
did I grow up according to plan?
and do you think I’m wasting my time doing things I wanna do?
but it hurts when you disapprove all along

interlude:
the crucifixion

11. Sometimes It Be That Way, Jewel

I’m sorry not all my love letters did rhyme
and I’m sorry that Jesus died for my sins
and I swear to God it won’t happen again

part three:
judas's post-crucifixion angst

12. Landed, Ben Folds

moved to the west coast away from everyone
she never told me that you called
back when I was still, I was still in love

13. How Long, The Eagles

well I been doing time in lonesome prison, where the sun don’t shine
just outside, the freedom river runs
out there in that shiny night, with blood hounds on your mind
don’t you know it’s the same sad situation?

14. Bend and Break, Keane

if only I don’t bend and break
I’ll meet you on the other side
I’ll meet you in the light
if only I don’t suffocate
I’ll meet you in the morning when you wake

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